Ego vs. Trust: What Separates Startup Teams That Thrive from Those That Stall

Part 2 in the Ego vs Trust series
Lessons from 25 Years of Leading Teams in Tech, Media, and Publishing
When people ask what separates early-stage teams that gain traction from those that stall, they’re often looking for a checklist. One of the most overlooked challenges in early-stage success is the tension between ego vs trust in startups. Typically they look for a growth playbook, a go-to-market strategy, a product framework. And while those things matter, in my experience, the answer runs deeper than tactics.
It’s about ego vs. trust—especially in the mindset of the founder or CEO.
Why Ego vs Trust in Startups Makes or Breaks Early Teams
Startups aren’t just smaller versions of established businesses. They’re fragile ecosystems of learning, risk-taking, and constant adjustment. Most people who join a startup do so not for the paycheck, but for the chance to build something that matters.
They sign up to help shape the product, the process, and even the culture. That’s part of what makes early teams so powerful—they believe they’re building it with you, not for you.
But this is exactly where things can start to go wrong.
The Ego Trap: When Founders Stop Listening
One of the most common failure patterns I’ve seen starts when a founder’s ego takes priority over trust in the team.
I’ve watched CEOs surround themselves with external advisors, fundraising mentors, and industry “experts”—all offering big-picture advice that feels more exciting than the hard, detailed work the team is doing on the ground.
- Soon, the founder starts overriding the product team.
- They bring back conflicting priorities.
- They chase new features based on the loudest outside voice.
- They stop listening to the people closest to the problem.
And here’s what happens next
- The team gets confused about what really matters.
- Execution slows as priorities keep shifting.
- Key contributors stop offering ideas because they no longer feel heard.
I’ve seen teams burn through millions in funding this way—not because the market wasn’t there, but because the team stopped believing in the mission and the process.
The Trust Advantage: Building Together
By contrast, founders who build trust create teams that move faster, learn faster, and stay committed when things get hard.
These founders know they don’t have all the answers.
They see their role not as the smartest person in the room, but as the conductor of the orchestra—bringing out the best in every player.
- They create space for engineers to bring customer feedback to the table.
- They validate team insights alongside outside perspectives.
- They keep the team aligned—not by dictating, but by guiding.
Traction happens when teams feel ownership, they know their voice matters, andWhen they trust that the hard work they’re doing is part of a bigger, coherent mission.
Beyond Startups: Why This Applies to Every Team
While I’ve seen this most often in tech ventures, it applies far beyond startups. I’ve experienced the same Ego vs Trust in Startups dynamic in media production, publishing, and even in the team that helped bring Jack’s Story to life—a World War II memoir we published to honor my father’s service.
Editors, designers, marketers, and family members all brought ideas to the table. The project only came to life because we built trust across those teams—listening, adapting, and moving together toward a common goal.
Final Thoughts on Ego vs Trust in Startups
Whether you’re leading a tech startup, launching a book, or building a new community initiative, remember this:
Traction comes when teams are empowered to learn, build, and move together...Stall happens when ego crowds out trust and alignment.
If you’ve seen this dynamic in your own work, “Ego vs Trust in Startups—or want to share your story—I’d love to hear from you. Feel free to drop a comment or reach out directly.
Let’s keep learning together.
Because at the end of the day, the real advantage isn’t in the pitch deck — it’s in the team that builds what comes next.
Related Reading: More Perspectives on Ego vs. Trust in Leadership
If you found this reflection helpful, you might also appreciate these two articles that explore the same tension between ego and team trust from different angles: Ego vs Trust in Startups
- The Silent Killer of Leadership: How Ego Destroys Influence & Trust by Ramon Velez
This article looks at how unchecked ego can quietly erode influence and trust within organizations. - Ego-Driven vs Principle-Driven Leadership by Hagberg Consulting
A helpful comparison of two leadership styles, with practical takeaways for founders and executives.
Both offer different but complementary perspectives on the challenge of balancing confidence with humility—something every leader faces, whether in startups or beyond.